Just a thought. It may not land on your runway. My plane taxis here from time to time...
It's always someone's fault... The It changes. The Someone changes. What doesn't change is that It is always someone's fault.
Or, at least I know... It's not MY fault. Right? (Hmmm...)
There are two things I can control when I am not in control. The first is BLAME. I gain a sense of control when I assign blame. At the very least, I can chunk any responsibility (of my own).
There is a problem with blame. When I blame I cast myself in the role of victim. Think about that: It is my life story, my play, my epic, and I relegate myself to minor character status. Or at best, I nominate myself for best supporting actor. In. My. Own. Damn. Story! Playing off a lead actor that is not even aware of my role in the tale.
This morning I watched a 20 minute video of Dwayne Johnson addressing his Instagram audience while standing in his fully equipped gym. Let me start by saying I am fan (though I've watched a total of 3 minutes of Professional Wrestling in my lifetime). I appreciate The Rock's intensity, entrepreneurship, talent, and even his perspectives.
When he first began speaking, I was miffed. Why? He was post-workout in a fully equipped gym! And I'm relegated to Amazon-delivered resistance bands to get my lactic acid fix. I was ready to blame. "It's easy for you Mr. Celebrity in your incredible gym to "shelter in place." I felt it creeping up... if I can blame him just a bit, I can feel better about my circumstances. (Again, hmmm...) Johnson actually addressed this in the video. He did it well and with empathy. And my respect grew.
I use this to illustrate how easy it is to play the part of victim by placing blame. Or, at least to scream, "It's not MY fault!" The fact is: It's not my/your fault... and that matters exactly zero!
I'm sheltering in place because of a virus. I hate this statement but, It is what it is. It is too easy to blame others - countries, leaders, basketballers or Winnie the Pooh (why not, as long as we're at it?). If finger-pointing occurs for ANY reason other than preparing to be better prepared in the future, it is worthless.* It is powerless. But it is not victimless. When I cry out, "It's someone's fault... It's not my fault... I become a victim. The problem with Blame Control? When I blame, I AM controlled.
There is another thing I control. It is BELIEF. It is FAITH. Faith creates a hope that is not dependent on circumstance. "It's not my fault" is deflated. However (or by whomever) the IT comes, I have the power to respond. And the best response is prepared response. Faith is muscular. It is built through training and trial.
I believe the greatest faith is more than a hope things will get better. It is even beyond a belief in myself. The overcoming kind of faith is in something (I believe someONE) bigger than me.
There is much I cannot control - viruses, tornadoes (yep, it's that time of year), or even the safety of a flight I jump on. But I will not blame. I will respond with the control of faith.
A long time ago a brilliant man wrote it, and I grew up singing it:
I know whom I have believed,
Am and persuaded,
That he is able,
To keep that which I've committed,
To him until that day.
For now,
D
*If you read any kind of political statement into this post, one of two things has occurred. Either I have miscommunicated my intent, or you have put on the glasses of bias. If the first is the case, forgive me and I'll rite gooder in the future. If the second, well It's not your fault that you are wearing them :)
