EQUATIONS OF LOVE...

Home after a crazy Saturday morning full of (kid) car care followed up by a great leg workout. (Whoops... I quit working out! See Why I'm Quitting Working Out - January 7th.) 

Anyway I flipped on the TV and caught the end of A Beautiful Mind. In his Nobel Prize acceptance speech John Nash says the following:

It is only in the mysterious equations of love that any logic or reasons can be found.

-- Russell Crowe as John Nash, A Beautiful Mind

There is much I want to write based on that line; both on relationships and faith. But sometimes we should just step back and admire beauty. And that statement paints a beautiful picture. So:

For now...

D

The Doubting Faithful

Now when John heard in prison about the deeds of the Christ, he sent word by his disciples and said to him (Jesus), "Are you the one who is to come, or shall we look for another?"

- Matthew 11:2-3

Never fear (your) doubt. Doubt is neither faith's opposite, nor faith's destroyer.  

You can no more have faith without doubt than be brave without fear.

- Anonymous

John the Baptist was as great a person of faith as ever roamed the planet, (according to Jesus a bit later in Matthew 11). Yet John dealt with the fog of doubt. 

He was in prison for doing the very thing he was born to do, the thing he was called to do. He was imprisoned because of his faithfulness. And in that prison cell - not long before giving his life for the cause - the fog settled in. 

He was not condemned or scolded by Jesus for expressing his doubt. Jesus did not respond, "Wait a minute, you saw the heavens open and the Spirit descend at my baptism. Come on John! You heard the voice... remember? What's wrong with you? Suck it up man!" Instead, Jesus gently reminds John (via his friends) of what John already knows, and has believed about Jesus. Then Jesus boasts on John's faithfulness.   

There is something beautifully powerful here that we should grasp. We need not fear our doubt - nor that of anyone else. And almost as importantly, we should not be made to feel guilty by our doubts.  

If I were preaching I might put a nice little three point outline together based on John's struggle: 1) Take inventory of your doubt; 2) Take action on your doubt; 3) Take your doubt straight to Jesus. (The short version might be: Assess it, Express it, Access it.)

Doubt only debilitates when we begin to fear it. We blow doubt up into a snarling monster that freezes us. Doubt should not debilitate though. Doubt should motivate. Its presence should motivate us to seek... to search... to call out to God. 

You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart

- Jeremiah 29:11

I think God is not offended by our doubt. He is bigger, he is more powerful than our doubts and questions. Doubts turned toward Christ become opportunity for greater faith. But doubts turned away from Christ become greater fear. And fear does debilitate. It freezes our faith, or it morphs into close-minded religious hypocrisy. 

Doubts are the ants in the pants of faith. They keep it awake and moving

- Frederick Buechner

Doubt is not a sign of faithlessness. Doubt is simply part of the exhaust of ...faith working through love (Galatians 5:6). 

Never fear your doubt. Take it to the One who understands... who loves... who overcomes...

God, you gave me a finite mind and with it, I attempt to know an infinite God. I will at times doubt. But I will bring you my doubts, because your love consumes them. And in love there is no place for fear. 

For now...

D

THE UNLIKELY

And he called to him his twelve disciples... the names of the twelve apostles are these...

-- Matthew 10:1-2

It is really not the best way to start a movement; certainly not one intended to change a planet. 

The roster is missing the names of A-listers. No moguls of industry. No celebrities. No national heroes. No influencers. 

Instead, on this list are fishermen - not the kind with TV shows and endorsement deals - but the hard-living, smell-like-fish-innards type. A tandem of power-hungry brothers are on the list; Jesus calls them Sons of Thunder, and I don't think for good reasons. Then there is the smoldering animosity between a nationalistic religious zealot and a tax-collecting sellout to occupying Rome. (And we think our political climate is volatile.)  A few other no-names are included. Oh yes, then there is a betrayer. 

It is not the best way to start a movement; certainly not one intended to change a planet. But here is something to think on: EACH ONE WAS CHOSEN. Though some of these guys may have stumbled into Jesus' path (from their perspective), Jesus didn't stumble when he walked directly into their lives. 

And what was true for them millennia ago, remains true today. We may take a stumbler's walk through life. But Jesus intentionally steps into our path. And he chooses us. 

He chose us before we were. Forever ago from the glory of heaven (wherever and whatever that is), he saw us. He chose us. And at the risk of melodrama I will say, hanging from a gruesome bloody cross, he looked down once again - this time through swollen eyes, but with perfect vision - and chose us. And daily as we stumble, he chooses us. 

By us, I mean for God so loved the world... US. Not just twelve. Not a select group of super-spirituals or special people. US. All of us, and maybe more powerfully, EACH of us. 

It is not the best way to carry on a movement; certainly not one intended to change a planet. Or maybe it is. 

God, you chose me, a stumbler. That blows my mind, breaks my heart, and gives me hope. 

For now...

D

Just People: A Powerful Three Minutes

Nothing is new in the world of social media and this short video may be recycled, having made the rounds for a while. But it was new to me.

Maybe you've seen this powerful message. Maybe you haven't. It is three minutes worth your time. (At least it was worth mine.) Maybe it will offend sensitivities in some way. 

No matter, it struck me. Seldom can I be brought to tears in the space of three minutes (one manly tear in each eye). 

People are people. We share so much, but focus so strongly on what we don't. We are each uniquely designed. And yet we share so much...

Original video from TV2 Denmark

For now...
D

A Stumbler's Walk | HE AIN'T HEAVY...

And... some people brought to him (Jesus) a paralytic, lying on a bed... 

-- Matthew 9:2

Three of the Gospel accounts run pretty parallel to each other in style and flow. These - Matthew, Mark and Luke - are known as the Synoptic Gospels. John's gospel is a bit different. Rather than beginning with Jesus' birth from an earthly perspective, it begins with a broader, heavenly view - In the beginning was the Word... - (and frankly, is my favorite).

OK, enough Bible 101. I mention it because the story of a paralytic brought to Jesus by his friends shows up in the three Synoptics - though with varying degree of detail - and it is a powerful one.

We don't know the back-story. Did the man request an audience with Jesus? Did he ask his friends to do the favor? Did he have hope, or was he long past it? Had he been paralyzed in an accident, from a sickness, or from birth? Was he a good man? Was he bitter? Had he given up? We don't know.

We do know this - he had friends. Not shake-your-hand-half-man-hug-you-only kind of friends. He had he-ain't-heavy-he's-my-brother kind of friends. And at least a couple of them had some big faith.

Matthew skips a couple details: Crowds surrounded Jesus as he was teaching. The house was crammed and people spilled out surrounding it, leaning into every doorway and window. They pressed in thick and close like people at baggage claim after a long flight (sorry, a personal pet peeve). And the friends carrying their friend on a stretcher of sorts can't find a way to Jesus. So they make one.

They hike up to the roof and dig a hole through it. Did they think about the cost? Was it a sin to destroy someone else's property? Did one of the group say, "Maybe we should try again tomorrow"? Did the paralytic urge them on, or was he just along for the ride? Again, we don't know.

They are committed to their friend. They are committed to do what it takes. They are committed to get him to Jesus. And they burn the ships; they begin to dig away at roof tiles.

We do know this, Jesus saw THEIR faith - the faith of the friends. There is so much that takes place in that little room with the new skylight in the next moments. Hypocrites are shamed. Crowds are amazed. Disciples look at each other and say, "Yep, that's just like Jesus." A man is healed - carried in and walks (skips) out. Friends high five. And Jesus does more than anyone ever conceived to ask. He healed the mans legs... and he healed the man's soul.

Jesus always did the unexpected. He always did more than what anyone had the guts to ask or think. He still does. I can't help but think of the smile he had - a funny little knowing grin - as the first particles of dirt began to rain down on his head from above. As the roof was torn away and the crowd gasped at the audacity, and I'm sure the home's owner grew red in the face, Jesus smiled. He knew what was happening, and he alone knew what was coming.

All because of the faith of some friends with dirt-caked fingernails.

Two scriptures to finish up:

Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil. For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow...

-- Ecclesiastes 4:9-10

Now to him who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us...

-- Ephesians 3:20

God, I will dig through roofs for my friends. Help me to have strong fingernails.

For now...

D

A Stumbler's Walk | ENOUGH?

 "Lord if you will..." (Man with Leprosy)

 "I will..." (Jesus)

-- Matthew 8:2-3

As a stumbler I sometimes doubt my position with God. How's that for blunt? I ask questions. Am I good enough? Am I doing enough? Am I enough? If you cannot relate, God bless you..., adjust your halo and come back for my next post.

The answer to these questions is... NO. No, I am not. (And neither are you.) And though a difficult admission, it is a freeing one. Though humbling and humiliating, it is good news. But we'll come back to that. 

Now to a deeper Stumbler's struggle. And this one is a bit darker and difficult to admit. I have never questioned the power of God. I have never questioned the wisdom or knowledge of God. He is and has always been in my mind all the Omnis the theologians proclaim - Omnipotent, Omniscient, Omnipresent. I have never even struggled with the goodness of God. My struggle is with his goodness toward me. And at it's core, am I enough that God would intimately care for - and be involved with - me.

Jesus has just "come down from the mountain;" the Sermon on the Mount mountain. He has moved and challenged the crowds. He has spoken words of truth and life that have ignited hearts and shamed hypocrites. Jesus comes down from the the mountain... and comes face to twisted decaying face with a leper.

There is SO much culturally and religiously wrong with the picture that I cannot take the space to describe. Short version: The leper should not have been there. The leper should not have so audaciously thought he had the right to appear before the Teacher (or any other non-leprous person for that matter). He was an outcast... a dreg... a left-behind. A leper was not good enough, could not be enough - was the opposite of enough -  to come to Jesus.

But here he is; blocking the path. The crowds that follow Jesus (down from the mountain) shrink away in disgust. Religion tends to do that. The man with half a face and no fingers says, "If you will, you can make me clean."

Only a few in the crowd (that came down from the mountain) believe Jesus CAN do it. None believe he WILL do it.

Then... Jesus reached out and touched him. Touched him. The man hadn't been looked in the eyes, addressed as human, or especially touched by another person in years. Jesus touched him. "I will; be (you are) clean." And the man was.

"I will..." Those were the words of Jesus then. They are the words of Jesus now. "I will..." They are the words of Jesus to me and to you; "I will..."

A leper was enough, because God saw his value, loved him, and said, "You are enough for my attention and touch."

You are enough because God sees your value, loves you, and says, "You are enough for my attention and touch." And so am I.

Thank God, our confidence is in God; and not in us. He is good. Always. And his love makes us enough.

God... If you are willing... Wait, I hear a whisper... "I am willing..."

For now,
D

A Stumbler's Walk | ON THE ROCK

(This is one of my Back-to-its. As I round the corner to finish up writing a thought on each chapter of the New Testament, I realize what a stumbler's walk it has been. If the name fits wear it...)

Everyone then who hears these words of mine and does them will be like a wise man who built his house on the rock. 

-- Jesus; Matthew 7:24

We all choose to build our house (life) on something. If we don't choose, by default the choice is made for us. And really, that is worse than choosing poorly. 

When I was in Jr. High we built a shed. It came as a kit from Sears; just a simple metal shed. Our next door neighbor must have seen the same sale ad in the paper. The following Saturday two sheds began to go up, very close to one another on opposite sides of the fence. Ours went up much more slowly because it began with a cement mixer, a pile of gravel, one of sand, 80# bags of cement, a wheelbarrow and shovel, and child labor. 

The next door neighbor's Taj Mahal was complete by the time our foundation forms came off. It was a little embarrassing to me. My dad knew what he was doing. 

The side-by-side sister sheds were completely identical to the eye a year after completion. Grass grew up around the bottoms to hide the secrets of each and it was in the days before string trimmers. 

Spring is tornado season in central Oklahoma. On a particular spring day several tornadoes surrounded. It was not a tornado however, but an 85 mile per hour straight wind that revealed truth, and made a lasting impression on me. My family stood watching the storm through the South-facing big bay window. The sky was a mixture of reds and greens and whites - colors that shouldn't be in a sky. (Oh - a note: That's what we Okies do when storms hit; we watch them. In retrospect, a basement might have been a good idea.) 

I vividly recall turning my attention to two side-by-side, seemingly identical sheds - one with a hidden secret. The wind beat against them as the hail pummeled. I can imagine their screams of aluminum terror. Then suddenly, the shed next door simply rolled over - three times actually. On the third roll it leapt into the air, and upon hitting the earth disintegrated into it's pre-assembled parts and blew away. Gone. Nothing but a bare spot where once had been a glorious shed. 

The next morning I walked out to our shed. It was hail-scarred and a little out of square. But it stood. And all the things it protected within were undamaged - saved by the shed's secret: a firm foundation.

We all choose to build our house (life) on something. If we don't choose, by default the choice is made for us. And really, that is worse than choosing poorly. A good foundation makes all the difference. We can drive stakes as deeply as we desire into unfirm ground. But eventually, they will tear away. When we build on a strong foundation, we weather the storm. Sure, we may be hail-scarred and a little out of square. But we will stand. Jesus promised.

One of my favorite Psalms reads:

I waited patiently on the Lord; 

and he inclined to me and heard my cry.

He drew me up from the pit of destruction,

Out of the miry bog,

and set my feet upon a rock,

making my steps secure.

He put a new song in my mouth,

a song of praise to our God. 

-- Psalm 40:1-3

Storms will come. You and I know it because we have lived it - are living it. Jesus said lives built on his words will stand through the storms. What words? He specifically refers to those we know as the Sermon on the Mount. These are words of relationship with God that overpowers religious presupposition; purity of motive (heart) that kills pretense and bigotry; authenticity that destroys hypocrisy. 

We are all building on something. And I hear the wind...

God, I will build my shed on you, the rock and only secure foundation.

For now...

D