A Stumbler's Walk | DOUBT (AND WORSHIP)

And when they saw him they worshiped him, but some doubted.

-- Matthew 28:17

Doubt is not the opposite of faith. Do not be discouraged by your doubt. 

Men and women followed Jesus for years. They gave up careers, livelihoods, dreams, and even relationships to be witnesses of this light that walked into darkness; this water that quenched the parchedness of desert-life. 

Now, after dreams had been crushed and hope vanquished, word has come - he is alive. The one who was crucified is risen. "Go," they are told, "meet him on the mountain." And they go.

There, the once-dead shows up - alive. Flesh and blood. Real. Living. 

They worship him. That is what one does when the horrifically crucified shows up alive and well. They worship him...

... and they doubt. 

It is easy for us to ask how they could doubt; seeing what they are seeing; experiencing the presence of a resurrected Jesus. How can they doubt? In reality, I would doubt too. But there on that mountain, they don't just doubt. They worship and doubt. 

Doubt is not the opposite of faith. Do not be discouraged by your doubt. That is much easier said than done. We do get discouraged by our doubt. Worse, we begin to fear our doubt. 

And fear is the opposite of faith.

If you struggle with doubt, worship and doubt. Fear cannot stand in the presence of worship. Faith increases. And though doubt may not completely exit stage left, it is moved to the corner. 

When the living Jesus stands in the spotlight of our lives, doubt scoots to the shadows. Doubt will (no doubt) reappear. That is OK. Do not fear it. 

Worship and doubt. 

God, I will worship you through my doubts. And you will overcome the fear my doubts create.

For now...

D

A Stumbler's Walk | CURTAINS

And behold, the curtain of the temple was torn in two, from top to bottom. 

-- Matthew 27:51

When I think of curtains - and who doesn't constantly think of curtains? - two things come into my mind's eye. One is the excitement of the curtains being drawn back at the beginning of a play or musical. The orchestra has been a cacophony of tuning noises, then all goes silent. Suddenly the silence gives way to the first note of the score, and the curtains are elegantly drawn back to reveal the lavish set that lay behind.

The other picture is the ceiling to floor curtains hung on large picture windows separating the light of the sun from the comfortable semi-darkness of the living room in our house.

Curtains exist for two purposes: Separation and revelation.

A massive curtain hung in the first-century temple. The thick and ornately woven tapestry was known as the veil.  It was a curtain of separation that hung between the Holy Place, where men could enter, and the Holy of Holies, where God symbolically dwealt; and only the High Priest could enter once a year on The Day of Atonement.

The veil symbolized the separation that exists between God and mankind. He is holy. We are flawed. As a curtain of separation it blocked his glorious light from our shadow-lives.

But something happened on the day of Christ's death. When Jesus shouted his grisly triumph from the cross and then died, the veil was torn completely in half from top to bottom.

God did the tearing from his end. We were (are) powerless to remove the curtain of separation. And in one dramatic moment, the veil that had separated became the drawn-back curtains of revelation.

Men and women have tried to tear this veil from bottom to top. They have failed. We still make the attempt - though the only curtains now are those of our own choosing and fabrication. We grab the bottom and try to tear skyward by being good enough. It does not rip. We put all our force into trying to be religious enough. But rather than tearing, the curtains of our making wrap around us. We try to hide in them the fact that we are flawed, scarred and scared. Oddly, these man-made curtains begin to restrict. They begin to suffocate life. And curtains separate.

When Christ sacrificed himself the veil was removed. The heavenly orchestra had gone silent. And though it would take three days for us to hear the music, the curtains had been drawn back. Love beyond imagination was revealed. Joy beyond expectation took the stage. Life without limit stood in the spotlight.

That which separated was gone.

God, help me not weave curtains that separate. You are the veil-ripper.

For now...
D

A Stumbler's Walk | PAPER CROWNS

And when the disciples saw it, they were indignant, saying, "Why this waste?"

-- Matthew 26:8

How can we compare what is wasted for God's kingdom with what is invested in our own? 

Maybe a better, and more personally revealing question; why do we compare? (I should note: having preached a couple thousand sermons, and now writing, I always did, do, and must, first ask such questions to the mirror.) 

In reality we probably don't stop too long or think too hard on these questions. It is easy and natural to invest in ourselves. I'm not referring here to taking care of ourselves, our families, our finances, our futures, etc. It is a good thing - a biblical thing - to invest in ourselves and others in such ways. No, what I am referring to here is a mindset - a focus that becomes a fixation - on building our own little kingdoms. I am speaking of investing in what is selfish and temporary; that which gratifies, but does not last or satisfy.

Days before Jesus' betrayal and arrest a wayward woman came into the house where he and his group were eating. She did the unthinkable by breaking open an expensive flask of perfumed ointment (valued at a year's salary), and proceeded to pour it all over Jesus' feet.

Jesus saw a sacrificial kingdom investment in the woman's action. The disciples saw waste. Needless to say the latter missed the point. It is easy, by the way, to armchair quarterback and point out the (apparent) failures of others. Usually in doing so, we are more exposing our own. Who knows if the woman knew the full significance of what she was doing; its prophetic foreshadowing. What is clear is that she had a small treasure and lavishly "wasted" it on One who was more her treasure. There was no moderation. There were no second thoughts.

Today each of us will invest somewhere. Some investments have lasting impact. Some simply dissipate like wispy smoke. Often that which initially appears as waste turns out to be the true kingdom investment.

Jesus put it this way:

Seek first the Kingdom of God... and all these (other) things will be added to you. 

--Matthew 6:33

From one stumbler to another, I struggle with my seeking... my investing. 

God, our kingdoms have rickety little cardboard thrones. And seated firmly on them, we wear handmade paper crowns. Remind me that paper burns easily and quickly; that when the fires of life come, handmade crowns and thrones fizzle into smoky ash. 

For now...
D

A Stumbler's Walk | BURIED TREASURES

But he who received the one talent went and dug in the ground and hid his master's money

-- Matthew 25:18

I have always been intrigued by stories of hidden treasure discovered. Whether it be The Count of Monte Cristo, a silly Matthew McConaughey movie or a Discovery Channel saga.

The questions have always lingered: Why did the owner of the treasure hide it in the first place; and why did he or she not return to get it.

In other words, why bury treasure? And why, if the plan is to return to it, does no one ever seem to get around to it? Most importantly, what motivates a person to bury treasure?

Jesus tells a story of three men in what is actually a pretty terrifying chapter of scripture. To each of these guys is given a certain amount of money (called talents). Two of the three, seeing themselves as stewards of their master's gift, invest and grow the treasure. The third however, buries it. The first two receive praise and reward for their efforts. The third receives what seems to be an overly-harsh punishment. (There must be more going on here.)

So back to the most important question. What motivates a person to bury treasure? I think it boils down to two things (and we'll add a third in a moment):

1. GREED
2. FEAR

Treasure-buriers hoard due to selfish greed. Treasure-buriers fear the loss of what they have.

Here is the problem with a treasure-burying mentality: The burier, nor anyone he/she might touch, gets to enjoy the treasure. No one reaps the benefits. Greed steals. Fear is a prison. And treasure unused makes no impact.

In the case of the three men in Jesus' story, a deeper motivation appears. This one is actually more dangerous and more sad than being controlled by greed and imprisoned by fear. It is a misunderstanding of the nature and character of the GIVER.

When we view God as a tyrannical slave-driver, it is natural to fall into the shadows of fear and greed. However, when we understand God to be the Giver of all good things (James 1:17), we begin to take on his giving nature. Also, when we understand that in God's economy  there is no limit to the pie, everything changes. (The pie economy - you take a piece and there is less left for me. God's economy - I give you a piece of the pie and there is just more pie.)

As preachers we always speak of Time, Talents and Treasures. (It just flows, and for some reason, triplets seem to preach.) Each of us will choose to invest or hoard; to use for the benefit of others, or bury.

One last thought on God's treasures:

...no eye has seen, nor ear heard, nor the heart of man imagined, 

what God has prepared for those who love him...

-- 1 Corinthians 2:9

God, I am often trapped by greed and fear, and bury my (your) treasure. Forgive me, and help me to invest.

For now...
D

A Stumbler's Walk | SANDCASTLES

Jesus left the temple and was going away, when his disciples came to point out to him the buildings of the temple. 

-- Matthew 24:1

This is one of those introductory statements in scripture that is so easily plowed through to get to the good stuff. But it is an interesting one considering all that is about to take place. 

Ponder the sheer silliness of the situation (and then we'll get to some depth in a moment). Jesus and the group are leaving the Temple. In other words, they have spent time in the Temple area. As they go, one of them taps Jesus on the shoulder and says, "Hey, turn around. Look at how glorious the Temple is. Have you ever noticed that building? Or that one? How about the Court of the Gentiles? Pretty cool, huh? Jesus, have you ever stopped and thought how holy the Holy of Holies really is?

Jesus could have responded, "Well, yeah... we were just there. I saw it all." Or he could have taken it to a whole other level: "You are impressed with the Temple, huh? Every stone was set in place to honor me. I am the One seated on the Mercy Seat. And before this place was built, I was a fire by night and cloud by day. I was in the Tabernacle. The scary holiness of the Arc of the Covenant pointed to me. I burned in a bush, I walked in a garden. I created the earth, moon and stars with a word. I wove you together from dust."

But that is not what Jesus said. He was patient with men who didn't deserve patience. Thank God, he is gracious to we who deserve grace's opposite.

In the end of the encounter Jesus says the temple itself will be destroyed and rebuilt. It is more than a prophecy of future events. Intertwining other statements of Jesus, we understand there is an underlying metaphor foreshadowing his crucifixion, burial and resurrection. But the disciples didn't get it. Frankly, neither would we - especially standing in shadow of the Temple's grandeur.

As Jesus tended to do, he points out spiritual truth in everyday occurance. The disciples are focused on the symbol, while all the time the One to whom the symbol points walks with them.

It is so easy to miss Jesus when we are focused on religion. We easily lose sight while we struggle to build impressive structures to honor God. (And by structures I mean processes, lists, behaviors, and lives.) In the end, what we have built takes our eyes away from why we built; from the One for whom we built. We tap Jesus on the shoulder and say, "Wait, turn around. Did you notice what I built?... I mean, what I built for you?"

And Jesus says to us, "It is not what you have built (for me) that matters or endures. Life is found and love is demonstrated in what I have given for you."

God, help me not to be impressed with the sandcastles I build for you.

For now…

D

The "R" Word

Regrets? I've had a few. But then again, too few to mention.

-- Frank Sinatra, My Way

Oh, that it were so, Frank!

(Note: This post is a little different from my norm. Some posts are devotional. Some are motivational. This one may be a bit of both - or neither - but it comes from a place that is personal.)

My son and I rented the movie La La Land this weekend. It was a departure from our usual testosterone-driven genre. A bit of a spoiler alert - and turn away now if you need to - it was heartbreaking. (Hey I told you to turn away. Besides, you've had ample time since the Academy Awards debacle, don't get mad at me.) In the same weekend we also watched The Internship for probably the eighth time.

There is a common theme flowing through these movies; though they go divergent directions with it. This theme proved for me to be particularly poignant. The emotion could have been due to my season in life, the dreary weather, massive post-workout protein loading; or a combination of all. But I think it lies deeper.

"...That's coming from someone who wakes up in the morning, 

and first thing on their calendar is regret..."

-- Nick Campbell (Owen Wilson), The Internship

The "R" word. It is a dirty word. It is a painful emotion. It can be a debilitating shadow. Regret.

Some people boast they live life with no regrets. "No Regrets!" (dude) has become a kind of war cry - usually before doing something stupid. (Like leaping off the world's highest bungee bridge with a rubber band strapped to your feet. See Bloukrans; http://davidmstanleykineticlife.blogspot.com/2014/09/bloukrans.html)

But even Sinatra admitted having a few. We all do. For some reason a couple of mine have become disturbingly active recently. But while I attempt authenticity and vulnerability in this forum, I don't want to make the reader uncomfortable; so I'll stop short of that line. 

Where the two movies diverge, is in how the main characters deal with regret. 

One is a redemption story; a tale of renewed purpose and deeper sense of self. A happy ending, if you will. 

The other is wrenching. (Spoiler alert!) It ends with a hauntingly simple melody being played by a man reliving the opportunities for love. Opportunities lost. And in the notes, if you listen closely, the piano keys can be heard weeping... "If only..."

Regret can be a cruel prison guard; ever reminding us of why we are incarcerated and cynically telling us there is no hope. Or regret can be the gunpowder propelling us in a new direction and to a new destination. "What ifs..." and "Only ifs..." must give way to "Next times..." and "This times..." that lead to moment-seizing victories.  

We will either release the past and forgive ourselves the part(s) we have played. Or we will slump over the keyboard and continually play the haunting melody of regret. 

For now...

D

A Stumbler's Walk | TRUTH

It is Easter morning. More importantly, it is a celebration of the resurrection morning. There are plenty of inspirational quotes, memes, etc. on Facebook (and I like them all), but I'm going in a bit of a different direction.

Faith has received a black eye in our culture. It is often seen as anti-intellectual, superstitious or passe.

I readily admit: I believe in something that requires a step of faith. I've staked my life on it. In my thinking, I've staked my forever on it. (I would ask, what strong belief doesn't require a faith-step at some point?)

However, just because something requires an element of faith it does not become anti-intellectual.

I believe Jesus to be the WAY, TRUTH and LIFE.

There, I said it. And I didn't lose any brain cells. I didn't pick up a banjo and begin to duel.

I believe:

Jesus was God incarnate.

Jesus died on a cross as an atonement for sin.

Jesus was buried (it's what happens to dead guys).

Jesus rose from the grave (not what normally happens...)

Jesus is alive. 

I believe in the miraculous. I believe in the intellectual. I have faith. I have a brain. 

Most religion shudders at questions. Man-made religion seeks to control and is therefore threatened by seeking or dissenting questions. If truth is true however, it can stand scrutiny. If God is God, he is not threatened by question. (Though humble seeking discovers - arrogance is a precipitous cliff.)

I recommend this short read (link below). Not because an MIT scientist proves the point of resurrection. More to demonstrate that Christianity and intellectualism are not at odds, as seems to be a popular notion. (I doubt this scientist even knows how to play a banjo.) 

Can a Scientist Believe in the Resurrection?

http://www.veritas.org/can-scientist-believe-resurrection-three-hypotheses/

So, with both faith and with a fairly well functioning brain I say:
He is Risen!
He is Risen Indeed!

Happy Easter.

God, as Jesus said, so I pray, "Lead us into all truth."

For now...
D