A Stumbler's Walk | THE POWER OF STORY

There is power in a story.

I'm prompted to write about story because I'm watching stories. I am somewhere over Indiana or Illinois in a mach-0.6-claustrophobic-tin-can-winged-rocket watching I AM SECOND videos. (Think about explaining that to your great grandfather.)

There is power in a story. I'll get right to the heart of this post... there is power in your story. There is power in mine.

The power of our story doesn't come at the end. We might think that to be: When things are tidy and clear, when the dirt is washed away, when we can finally say, "Whew, it was tough but I've arrived." But that is not the power. Really, when I think about it, once we arrive the power of story fades.

No, the power of our story is in its living. It is - more than in the retelling - in its during-telling. What I mean is that Once Upon a Time... is nice. But telling our story from the middle is raw and authentically powerful.

Transformation from caterpillar to chrysalis to butterfly is definable. It is quick and seemingly painless. (I've never heard differently from a Monarch.) Human transformations are none of these. Our stories are messy. Sometimes chapter five looks out of place and chapter nine seems completely unnecessary. We write and often rewrite (or even contradict) our own paragraphs. There are gaps, tangent-chapters and awkward pauses.

That is OK. More, it is beautiful. No one can write or tell our story like we can. No one knows the joys and dark wrestling matches that accompany our transformation. Human is messy. The combination of flesh and God-image can be chaotic. (May I invent a compound term? Chaotically-peaceful. Or, peacefully-chaotic. You pick.)

I've always wondered what happens after, "And they lived happily ever after." Is the adventure over? Transformation done? What comes next? The truth is our lives are a series of, Once upon a times...* 

(Well, I'm going to stop here for now. More to come. This hurtling tube of flying stale air just touched down. I guess I've arrived. But only in this part of my story...)

For now...
D


*Read the Apostle Paul's words on transformation in 2 Corinthians 3:18.

A Stumbler's Walk | MOUNTAINS

The night is far gone; the day is at hand. So then let us cast off the works of darkness and put on the armor of light. - Romans 13:12

Now is the time to live our faith. Today. We cannot live it tomorrow. Today is what we have. 

The successes and failures of yesterday(s) are past. They cannot carry us today. They cannot paralyze us today (unless we give them that unearned power.

The Christian life is often referred to as a "walk." That is appropriate. As I write, I am 35,000 feet above mountains, traveling at 500 miles per hour. I began in one time zone, one climate, and will touch down in completely different ones; all within the space of a couple hours.

We are miles above mountains. And though the view passing the small window is beautiful, I am not experiencing the mountains. I am not climbing on a trail with near burning lungs, exhilarated. Instead, I am breathing stale air eating peanuts; waiting to reach a destination.

Mountains are to be experienced. They are to be walked (skied, boarded, hiked, fished…). They are not to be overflown. In the same way our lives are not about reaching a destination. God created us for the walk… with him, and others. A journey. And just like on a mountain hike, there will be falls. Bumps, bruises and worse will be suffered. But there is also exhilaration.

Yesterday, with it's good and bad, is gone. Tomorrow is a destination we may or may not reach. Odds are we will. But we cannot live in either place today.

"The day is at hand." Today is the day of faith. Today is the day to…
- Forgive yourself
- To begin again
- To reconcile
- To stop what should not be
- To start what should be
- To live our faith

God, neither yesterday nor tomorrow can control me, you are the Lord of my "right now".

For now...

D

A Stumbler's Walk | SPOTLIGHT

Outdo one another in showing honor. 

- Romans 12:10 

It is natural to compare and compete. It is natural. And it is very often unhealthy.

I am not referring to athletic competition or sales incentives at the workplace, etc. Nor am I talking about going for the throat in Monopoly on family game night. Obviously there is healthy and fun competition. So let's move on from there.

I am talking about competition that arises from comparison. Jesus said, "The thief comes to kill, to steal, and to destroy…" (John 10:10). And we set ourselves up to have our joy stolen when we choose to compare ourselves to others. 

Comparison creates a false measure that causes us to fall into either self-righteousness or despair. (We can always find those with whom we feel we measure up favorably and those with whom we cannot.)

That said, Paul does challenge us into competition in one area - showing honor. As a matter of fact, he exhorts us to "outdo one another." This is not comparison. It is humility in action.

Showing honor should not be false, and can only be faked for so long. Here is the rub; to truly show honor to another, we must be comfortable with our own identity. When we know who we are in Christ, when we are solid in our identity as beloved children who are being transformed into his image; we are no longer threatened when others shine. As a matter of fact, we are most like Christ when we help others shine - when we take the spotlight and point it toward them.

We never shine so brightly as when we humbly illuminate others.

Shine the light of Christ.

God, shine your light through me to illuminate others.

For now...
D

A Stumbler's Walk | PROMISE?

But it is not as though the word of God has failed. - Romans 9:8 

How we face difficulty speaks deeply of our faith life. Difficult people, hard circumstances, seemingly unfulfilled promises; each of these are character testers… character revealers… character builders.

Our tendency is often to whine and complain. Ultimately these responses arise out of our insecurity, self-centeredness and fear. In other words, our lack of faith.

Hope you are uplifted, and happy Sunday! Kidding, I wouldn't leave it there.

In difficult times, our focus makes all the difference. And it is our choice. Will we focus on ourselves? Our circumstances? Or will we choose to focus on the One who is at work in the midst of every circumstance to produce in us what he desires? The writer of Hebrews puts it this way, "…let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, fixing our eyes on Jesus…" (Hebrews 12:1-2).

We need to know a few things: (And not just know with our heads; but unshakably hold in our hearts also.)

1) God is at work in our lives: 

Paul writes "…he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion…" (Philippians 1:6). God does not grow tired. His patience is incredible. He is invested in us. (Just look at a cross - that invested).

2) God always fulfills his promises: 

"Know therefore that the LORD your God is God, the faithful God who keeps covenant and steadfast love with those who love him…" (Deuteronomy 7:9). Not sometimes. Not when he remembers. But not in our timing either. (We'll come to that.)

3) God's word is alive and powerful: 

"For the word of God is alive and active…" (Hebrews 4:12). Isaiah writes, "For as the rain and the snow come down from heaven and do not return there but water the earth... so shall my word be that goes out from my mouth; it shall not return to me empty, but it shall accomplish that which I purpose, and shall succeed in the thing for which I sent it," (Isaiah 55:10-11).

4) God's timing and our timing are based on different perspectives:

In short, he sees all. He knows all. We don't. He is infinite. We are not. Through the prophet Isaiah God says, "For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts," (Isaiah 55:8-9).

In the midst of trial, God is at work.

When the promise seems so long ago and so hopeless, God hasn't forgotten.

When the circumstances are overwhelming, the One who calmed the storm can do the same IN you.

God has not forgotten us. His word has never failed. He is intimately at work, forming our hearts to be more like Jesus.

Easy? No. Comfortable? Nope.

But good!

God, you have never failed me (and I know you never will)!

For now...

D

A Stumbler's Walk | FORGETTING & PRESSING

(I need to begin with a disclaimer; more of an admission really: Have you every committed your time and energy to a movie that sets the problem, builds and captures you emotionally... then ends? No resolution. No closure. No aha moment. This post may be like that.)

Sometimes I write with an end in mind. Sometimes there is a big idea that forges its way through to conclusion. Sometimes I begin and just see where the path leads. And sometimes there is just a gnawing - a bit of a bleeding beginning point. (That alliteration was brought to you by four years of seminary and countless sermons.) This one feels like a combination, with a leaning toward the last. 

So here goes...

Over the course of closing out an old year and launching a new, I read multiple writings on the clean slate that is 2019. I reposted something I'd previously written centering around this idea, (see A Personal Note to the New Year.) And though I agree with most I read, and certainly (you'd hope) with what I wrote, there was that gnawing. 

Here's the giant premise: 

As much as we'd like to think it so; 

as resolved and motivated for change as we'd like to be; 

the whiteboard that is the new year - 2019 - is not clean. 

It is not blank. 

Wow! I feel like an anti-positive-thinking deviant or faithless pessimist to ponder the thought - much less to write it. (Don't check out yet! I have a feeling this may actually go somewhere.) 

There was no magical Y2K like barrier that suddenly erased our whiteboard when the clock struck 12:00:01 on January 1, 2019. (BTW... if you remember, there wasn't one corresponding to Y2K either, and that caused huge relief!) 

Back to the giant premise: I posited the whiteboard that is the new year is not clean. The fact is we began writing on that board long ago. We crossed the divide into a new year carrying luggage. Each of us made the voyage with bags fully packed - packed with past hopes, past fears, past regrets, past happinesses, past hurts, past resolutions, past lookings-forward... You get the idea. (And sorry for the mixing of metaphors.)

So giant premise part 1? Simply stated, the whiteboard has a lot of crap on it already. Good stuff. Bad stuff. And a ton of stuff so illegible it can't be deciphered. 

Giant premise part 2 (pt.1b? - I don't know, I'm making this up as I go): 

Things have to be erased. 

You are either WAY ahead of me, or disappointed with my lack of Aha inspiration (or both - see disclaimer!). But the fact of the matter is, space must be cleared. Writing, doodling away with the various colors, is fun. It feels - and is - so creative. But erasing can be exhilarating. It is cathartic. It is freeing. And it is necessary. 

White space must be created. (I would posit that it can be equally as creative as multi-marker doodles.) And the only way to do this erasing is with vigorous and intentional swiping left-to-right and up-and-down. Some spots will require work. We will have to break out the spray and rags. Two-handed full-body waggle action will be necessary to scrub away some of the long-written remnants. 

And somewhere along the way, someone has written on our boards with permanent marker; some of it in tiny script, some in 42 point bold Helvitica. It is not easily erased. But it is not really permanent. It doesn't need be. I hesitate to ask this, but I'm asking: Trust me...?

It is not permanent. 

It can be erased. 

It can be cleared. 

The white board can be cleaned. 

Will it take some scrubbing? Yep. Will it be easy? Nope. Can it be erased? Yep. 

Those of you who know me may wonder why I haven't brought the Bible into this as of yet. Well, not to disappoint. We often read the following quote from the Apostle Paul; it pops up in motivational memes and rear-window stickers:

...press on toward to goal... - Philippians 3:14

Notice the ellipses before and after the quoted phrase. Let's focus on the one preceding. Something comes before the pressing. The context...context...context within me wants to back way up; but for now we'll just move halfway back into verse 13:

But one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind 

and straining forward to what lies ahead, 

I press on toward the goal...

Before the pressing comes forgetting. There cannot be real pressing without some forgetting. Staying with our white board metaphor: Before the writing comes the erasing.

There are things we must be free of. Free to press by forgetting. Free to write by erasing. Oh, and some good news:

Whom the Son sets free is truly free! - John 8:36

God doesn't call us to write on already jumbled, decipherable scribbles. He frees us to write on clean spaces. He frees us to erase and create. 

New year, 

You are a whiteboard, but you are not clean. 

I want to write new things - incredible things on you. 

But space has to be cleared. I will scrub. And I will write. 

You don't have to be completely clean before I begin my new doodles. 

I will clear one spot at a time. 

I will the reread the good with a smile. 

I may weep over some of what is written. 

But neither will lock me in. 

I am free to erase. 

I am free to write. 

I am free to forget. 

I am free to press on...

For now,
D

A Personal Note to the New Year

(Note: I wrote this as last year's calendar fizzled. It popped up as a memory and kick-started by hamster-wheel brain. I plan to follow it up in the next few days with a couple corresponding posts dealing with "IFs". Finally, I think it will come full circle. I have some thought percolations on the dry erase board of 2019.)

A Personal Note to 2017 & 2018

Dear 2017,

Thanks and it was good to know you. You were good to me for the most part.

You certainly brought highs and lows; but overall, the highs were higher than the lows were low. Once in a while I will look back upon you with fondness; and hopefully, very little regret.

Honestly though, it will not be often. I'd rather keep my eyes forward - and in a bit, you will be behind.

You'll have to see yourself out. I plan to sleep through your retirement. So I'll say goodnight old friend. I hope the brotherhood of past years welcomes you to their fraternity and treats you kindly. (Though I'd keep an eye out for 1350 and 1918 (both anno domini), the Dark Ages, and most of the BC years - they can be a bit grumpy and old fashioned.)


Dear 2018,

Welcome. I'm excited to meet you. Forgive me that I'm not up when you arrive. I'd rather have coffee with you after sunrise, than shots with you tonight. Besides, you are going to be meeting a lot of new faces in the next few hours and if you're anything like me with names... well...

I look forward to exploring all you have in store. There will be joys as well as pains, but I have a good feeling about you. I think we will be friends. As a matter of fact, I might make it my resolution.


You know, I just realized something: 2017, like age, you are just a number. You were what I made of you.

And 2018, you are the same; a perfectly clean whiteboard awaiting my squeaky marker. I won't write neatly. There will be misspellings. But I hope to fill you to the borders with love, joy, purpose, family, friends... and a host of passionate pursuits.

It's kind of funny; I wrap up this note in a limbo time between the two of you. And yet here I am. One of you is on the way out, the other coming. And yet I have now. Maybe that is the lesson from all the years past and for those upcoming... I have now. Now is all I have. So now is what I will make the most of.
(And 2018, I promise to try to stop ending sentences with prepositions. Another resolution? Nah.)

So, goodbye and hello.
Your friend,
D

A Stumbler's Walk | WHAT IS TRUTH?

Pilate said to him (Jesus), "What is truth?" - John 18:38

Pilate looked into the face of The Way, the Truth, and the Life and asked him, "what is truth?" With a conflicted mixture of arrogance, ignorance and longing, Pilate stared into the eyes of the Life-Giver, and wondered aloud about the meaning of life.

We may not voice the questions. But they are there. We believe in a God we cannot see. We trust the guidance of a Spirit we cannot hear. We rely on the goodness of an all-powerful Creator, and yet see the devastation that takes place daily in our world; sometimes personally, and close to home.

Paul wrote: "We are afflicted in every way, but not crushed; perplexed, but not driven to despair; persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed," (2 Corinthians 4:8-9).

"What is Truth?"

Jesus knew Pilate. In the moment that Pilate asked the question, Jesus saw beyond the power and the pomp. Jesus knew Pilate's heart; and the pain and fear that resided there. A few moments later Pilate washed his hands of Jesus (both literally and figuratively). But Jesus went to the cross for Pilate; for all the Pilates. He went to the cross for the Pilate in you and in me.

Our fear, our arrogance, our questions of Why?… Jesus took them with him to the cross. And there he proved the truth of love. And ultimately, if we will allow, his love overwhelms our questions.

"What is Truth?"

The answer is not a philosophical one. It is not a religious one. Nor is it merely theological.

"What is Truth?"

The Answer is a person. Look to the cross. There Truth demonstrated himself in love. And he is the same for us today.

God, overwhelm me with the truth of your love.

For now...
D